Do you believe that your core self is constant no matter where you live and how old you get?
Gestalt therapy believes the self is not static, but an ongoing process - "selfing" instead of "self". Wouldn't it be nice to experience the world like a baby, full of curiosity and spontaneity?
But it's extremely hard. Because we as human beings naturally tend to create fixed patterns and routines so we can be relieved of the anxiety of the unknown. One of the common internal conflicts I see in sessions is the conflict between spontaneity and safety.
So how can we live more authentically? Here are a few things to try:
1) allow yourself to be anxious/angry/sad, these feelings are natural and they make a crucial part of you;
2) become mindful of your emotions and their corresponding physical sensations (e.g. How do I experience sadness in my body?);
3) acknowledge those old coping strategies that used to support you but is now holding you back, and then gently let them go. How's your selfing today?
*Follow me on Instagram @therapywithyiwen for tips to get along with yourself and everyone else.
